The father is the first man to appear in the life of the little princess. How to become a good dad for your daughter? After all, through communication with her dad, the girl will get acquainted with the world of men and make sure that he is not dangerous for her.
For a daughter, a father is a dear person from a foreign world; by communicating with him, the baby learns to understand men and their outlook on life. Growing up, a girl begins to build relationships with the opposite sex by analogy with relationships in the family. It is very important to build the father-daughter relationship correctly, then the woman in her family will be happy and successful in love. You can and should become a good dad not only for your daughter, but also for your son.
Communication with a daughter is different from raising a son. Girls are more vulnerable, more fearful and sentimental, and the father’s task is to protect and overcome fears and insecurities. Forget about punishment and authoritarian behavior in education! Imagine how a little girl will feel when an adult man shouts at her or threatens her. Nothing but horror and helplessness. And a good father is her main protector, next to whom she always feels reliable, calm and safe.
You shouldn’t tell scary fairy tales, show creepy cartoons, or scare people with other people’s guys and devils. A good dad should teach how to ride a bike, swim, fish, and be friends with boys.
In India they say: “Don’t hit a woman even with a flower.” Remember this, and your daughter, seeing your attitude towards her, will grow up to be a kind, feminine and affectionate girl. Even if something irritates you in your daughter’s behavior, talk to her, try to discuss each situation. Be sure to tell her how much you love her, despite the troubles or disobedience. This is very important for my daughter!
We condemn actions, behavior, not the child. When communicating with your daughter, admire her talents, admire her hairstyles and outfits, pamper her with toys and trips to the park, circus, and theater. Bring gifts for no reason! Every day, arrange surprises for your daughter: a notebook, a beautiful pen, a small doll, a calendar, a book, candy, a flower. Imagine! This is not burdensome on your wallet, but will add joy and trust to your communication with your daughter. The girls are very grateful: your daughter will certainly prepare cards and gifts for you with her own hands. Praise your mother and her work in front of your daughter, help with the housework, water the flowers and wash the dishes, and don’t skimp on compliments.
“Daddy loves me, I’m good!” Such approval and acceptance increases self-esteem, the little princess will learn to feel confident and safe, feel her feminine nature and will never become a failure in life. My daughter will forever remember her happy childhood and the best dad in the world.
The birth and upbringing of offspring is the meaning of life, the main task of all living beings on the planet. For people, children become a joy, a source of pride, a living symbol of an eternal connection with a loved one. Fatherhood is one of the most important manifestations of masculinity. Today, the role and tasks of the father in society are undergoing changes and not all men are ready for them.
For hundreds of years, the relationship between fathers and sons remained unchanged. Today, their role is leveled out - sons no longer inherit power, responsibilities, and are not raised as heads of the family. With the passing of patriarchy, many families simply were not offered an adequate model for building new relationships between fathers and sons.
How did it start?
Around 200 years ago, society became more industrialized and fathers were given the responsibility of providing for the family. Since the father could not give birth to a child and breastfeed him, he could only go to work and earn money. This was the beginning of the end of the era when fathers raised their sons.
In recent decades, fathers are rapidly turning from parents into breadwinners, and sons from children into consumers. The status of a father today is measured not only and not so much by how much time he devotes to his children, but by how well he supports his family, how much he has achieved in his professional field, how much he earns, what kind of car he drives. What is it - work for the sake of family or work for the sake of work?
In addition, having found themselves in such a situation, many fathers have relieved themselves of responsibility for raising their children and now a poorly raised child is a child raised by his mother. Fathers are too busy for their children and communication is limited to just a few words over dinner and going somewhere together once a week. Many more important things take up father's time - extracurricular work, computer, TV, hobbies and friends. But not children. Unfortunately, there is not enough time for children.
The reduction of families also plays an important role. If earlier in a large family a boy could receive male attention and education not only from his father, but also from his uncle, cousins or grandfather, today families are limited only to spouses and their children. Thus, boys grow up without fathers and consider this normal. The modern generation is growing up with the confidence that a father’s life is work, and the family must come to terms with this and not expect more participation from him.
Consequences of lack of paternal attention
Life for most boys and for many adult men turns into a search for a model of behavior that was not laid down in childhood by the father. At the moment when a father does not give his son protection, understanding, communication, guidance and support, he dooms him to endless searches that lead his grown sons to crime, make them unable to build a harmonious relationship with a woman, turn them into womanizers, losers, criminals. And all this is a lack of paternal attention in childhood!
Currently, our children have a total lack of attention from their fathers. However, this does not mean at all that it is replaced by the mother’s attention. It is quite natural that in the modern world a mother cannot cope well enough with the roles of both parents.
What can fatherhood give a man?
If for a boy his father’s attention is the key to a full upbringing, then for the father himself it is an opportunity to feel needed, important, and strong. This is a perfect collaboration that makes both parties happy.
Time spent with children becomes an opportunity to return to one's own childhood, a chance to analyze the mistakes of one's father and correct them. Being a good father is the most important and courageous thing a man can do. Not a single job, not a single salary will make a man a good father, but only his participation in the lives of his children, his work invested in his heirs, his time spent with real benefit for the family and all humanity.
Many young men who are about to experience the joy of fatherhood are panicked by this. However, they cannot give any explanation as to what exactly causes them such horror. For them, children are something that poses a danger to their life and freedom.
According to psychologists, this attitude towards fatherhood in men can be explained by the fear of the unknown, which every normal person has. How to overcome this fear and how to become a good father for your newborn baby?
To do this, first of all, you need to calm down, soberly assess the situation and think about whether the danger is actually as great as it seems to you. To make this easier, try following some simple recommendations.
1. Don't focus on being the best dad on the planet.
No matter how strange it may sound, in order to become a good dad, you don’t need to study anything specially anywhere. You don't have to become a professional diaper changer or a diaper changing guru. The baby’s mother can easily cope with this, and the only thing that is required of you is to be a reliable support for her and.
2. Don't become a recluse and continue your normal life.
Some couples who have recently become parents for some reason believe that now they must stay at home all the time, not go anywhere and not communicate with anyone. Sometimes such self-isolation can last up to several years.
They do this completely in vain. Of course, they can be understood, because they fear for the life and health of the child, but the danger is not as great as they think. Just two weeks after the baby is born, you can start taking him with you on all your trips to cafes or shops. Moreover, modern means of transporting children make this process easy and convenient.
3. Help the baby's mother and wake up with her for night feeding.
Of course, at first it will be very difficult to do this. But are you interested in how to become a good father? It is very important for a child to live in a strong and loving family, and this means that you must support your wife in everything. Just imagine how hard it is for her to fuss with the child all day, and then wake up alone at night. If you support her and start waking up together, this will unite your family and strengthen family relationships.
4. Don't be shy about hugging your baby tightly.
As already mentioned, a child should feel love and care towards himself, but no matter how much you tell him how much you love him, this will not give anything at all - the child does not understand words yet! Therefore, he can only find out about your feelings with the help of hugs, kisses, and strokes.
5. Treat your child the way you wanted to be treated as a child.
Take a moment to think about how you were raised by your own father. If you are still confident that he is the best father on the planet, even if he not only spoiled you, but sometimes punished you, just take his experience into account. If you are not sure about this, try to correct what you consider to be an error.
6. Never hit a child.
There is no greater shame for a man than to raise his hand against a child or woman. If you allow yourself this, then about how to become a good father, you may not even dream.
7. Carefully filter the advice that relates to raising a child.
Recently, a huge amount of all kinds of literature has appeared, advising on how to raise a child correctly. In addition, similar information is available on television. Very often such advice contradicts each other, so do not rush to implement them right away. Instead, try to analyze them and discard everything that, at the level of instincts, seems doubtful to you.
8. Enjoy communication with your child, because his childhood will end very quickly.
In the first days when your baby is just born, it will seem to you that his childhood will last forever. However, very soon he will go to kindergarten, school, or college. Before you know it, he'll have his own children. Therefore, learn to appreciate every minute that you can spend with your baby, so as not to reproach yourself in the future for not being able to pay more attention to your child in childhood.
Do everything with love and you can become the best father!
What is it like to be a father? The rules for raising a child by a father are changing along with the development of society and changing ideas about traditional family values. Using the positive tips described below, a father can help his children become more confident and improve their self-esteem. He will learn how to deal with children, help them and be truly loving.
Families can be very different these days. Many raise a child alone, some couples prefer not to marry, some live with representatives of older generations. Over the past decades, public perception of the norm has changed, the number of women working has increased, and the number of divorces and remarriages has increased. All this affects maternal and paternal roles.
Communication between a modern father and a child is very different from what it was like decades ago. Fathers have more options and a different approach to how to fulfill their role. Modern people no longer automatically rely on their own childhood impressions. He understands that the behavior of his own father will no longer be inappropriate in our realities. Studies have shown that understanding and kind fathers raise children with higher self-esteem. They achieve more in life, they are more popular with others and they adapt well. A loving father guarantees excellent support without imposing his will. So how do you achieve a good father-child relationship? Try one of these tips!
Spend time with your child
When a father spends time with his child, he can demonstrate his values to him. Children grow up quickly, and there will never be a better time to connect. There are many great ways to have fun with your kids.
Raise with love and a positive attitude
All children require a positive approach and discipline rather than punishment. You just need to learn to set reasonable boundaries. Fathers need to remind children of the consequences of their actions and model desired behavior in positive ways. A father who communicates calmly and thoughtfully demonstrates love for his children well.
Be a role model for your child
It doesn't matter whether the child himself understands it, his father's behavior always serves as a model for him. A girl who spends time with a loving dad grows up knowing how she should be treated. She expects respect from guys and knows what to look for in a partner. Fathers teach important things to both boys and girls, demonstrating honesty, modesty, and a responsible attitude.
Earn your right to attention
Fathers should start discussing important things with their children from a very young age. In this case, the most difficult issues that will arise over the years will be easier to solve. Take time to listen to your child's ideas and concerns.
Be your child's mentor
To be a good father, you should teach your children what is right and what is wrong. Reward their good behavior. Make sure your child makes the right choices. A father who is interested in education daily shows his children correct examples that allow them to learn the basics of life.
Eat together
An important part of a happy family life is having dinner together. This gives children the opportunity to talk to their parents about what they are doing and what they plan to do. This is a good moment for a father to listen to his children and show his attention. This creates a basis for family communication.
Read aloud to your child
In the modern world, people are surrounded by television and the Internet. It is important to take conscious steps to encourage your child to enjoy reading. To do this, you need to read it out loud to him. Start reading from a very early age, and then teach your child to read independently. Instilling a love of reading is the best way to ensure your child's personal and career growth in the future.
Respect your child's mother
Parents who respect each other and demonstrate this to their children create an atmosphere of safety. When children know that their parents respect each other, it is easier for them to feel accepted and respected.
Start acting as early as possible
Show interest in your baby even before he is born. Try to understand your role as a father during your pregnancy or adoption process. Start touching, holding, playing and talking to your baby from the very first days. When a father is busy raising a child, he clearly demonstrates to him that he is interested in him and that this relationship is of great importance to him.
Final Conclusion
Few events can change a man's life as much as the birth of a child. Responsibility for another person is a very serious task that brings many happy moments. There is nothing more beautiful than watching a child grow and become an adult. If you use the tips above, you can learn how to parent and be a great, understanding and loving father.